The title of this article may seem obvious to people, but in our very transient, ever changing world, I think we lose sight of ourselves when we search for a home. Because we've moved a lot even after retiring from the Navy, this topic is more important to me personally, and I really try to hone in on it with my buyers while I help them search for the necessity as well as for the real comfort of a new habitat.

Let's look at the word "habitat" for a second. Most people think of the animal world when we hear this word, but if you look at the definition, the natural home or environment, that certainly speaks to us. Whether you're single, married, have children, are empty nesters, widowed, divorced and starting over, our homes become our safe havens, don't they? Don't we love to just get home so we can put our feet up, sit on the porch with a glass of our favorite beverage, listen to the birds, talk to our family we've been away from all day, etc? When searching for a home, many of us get caught up in "just getting a house"! But a house is just a structure. You're really out to find a home.

According to a few articles I've read, Americans move an average of 11.7 times in their lifetime. That's a lot compared to when our grandparents lived. It was very common to stay in the same town or neighborhood as your parents whereas that's not at all common today. While there are many that have done this, most have moved at least 5-7x if not more. Personally, during the time we lived in PA we moved 4x in the same county. I will say that selling the 3rd house was very emotional for me because of the feeling of habitat.

If you have the blessing of buying your first home and staying in it until the kids leave or even until the grandkids grow up, you know what I mean when I say your home is your habitat. Your home is your digs, the place you've experienced love, sadness, joy, comfort, frustration, acceptance, etc. If you have had to move a bit more, you can lose sight of that full experience as you search for your new home. As a buyer's agent, I really try to observe my clients' body language and "read between the lines" when they speak and describe what kind of house and neighborhood they're looking for. My goal is to do my best to understand them and help them find a new place that really suits them rather than compromise so much they lose themselves.

If you're in the hunt, you certainly know what I'm talking about. If you "got the bug" to buy a home during the upswing of prices, this made searching for a home REALLY stressful, moreso than normal. You may have lost lots bids on homes and it got very frustrating very fast. You may have started bidding on places you weren't too excited about but could make work. The result may have been that you became desperate and started to lose yourselves and lose sight of what you were really after, a home for your family to come and visit and enjoy with you. I know I've been there.

How can we overcome this? Keep your eye on your desires, how you actually live, and how you want to feel in your home. Buying a home is like finding a new church. In both cases, you know when you enter. You know right away even if the home needs some sprucing or just needs your personal touch. Does it check every box even though you may want some changes to make it your own? Can you see yourselves relaxing, enjoying the family, having company, etc and it felt right? I can tell when I show clients a home they find a possibility and one they don't. They may not even realize they're showing it, but the glimmer in their eyes is either there or it's not.

When you start looking or if you are in the midst of looking, be sensitive to your gut feelings and hold out for the right house. Be sure to tell your agent any and all things you'd like to have in your new abode. Trust that you will find it even if you have a deadline like the start of a new position. If you have to move quickly, consider renting first to get a feel for your new surroundings. It's worth spending the money to rent to have the time to make the biggest investment one makes in his life. Don't lose sight of who you are and how you know you live. Your home needs to be a place of solace. Make the time to find the right "habitat" for you and your family. You're all worth the extra effort.